Working through THE LIST (or My Captain Needs a Lobotomy)

Repositioned the SSB antenna on the backstay

Everybody has one whether you’re a landlubber or cruiser.   Some are short and consist of relatively mundane tasks, while others seem to grow to insurmountable lengths. The routine maintenance chores get done with little effort.  However, the “FIX or REPLACE” punch list take a lot more planning and doing especially when the boat is located off of an unspoiled island in the Caribbean.

We didn’t have much of a TO-DO LIST until we were within sight of Bonaire this June and discovered that all three portholes in the starboard side hull were leaking after a three day sail on a port tack. Shortly after that, we had a problem with the transmission- the subject of our blog in June “FORWARD…NEUTRAL…REVERSE…”.  Since then one of the heads has been finicky, then one water maker pump chimed in with its own need for attention, and finally, the boat engine’s fresh water circulating pump and a hose wore out.

Added mosquito netting on the wind scoop.

The good news is: the necessary parts can be ordered while in paradise.  The bad news is: they will get delivered E V E N T U A L LY.  And just how long do you think “eventually” is?  Well, we can inform you that it varies, but things usually get shipped in before your six months of time allowed in Bonaire-if you’re an American- expires.  More good news:  if the parts don’t arrive, the officials at Customs & Immigration DO accept that as a valid reason to extend your stay.

As First & Last Mate of the good ship EXIT STRATEGY, I am quite skilled in wiping out mildew, scrubbing the deck and waterline, handling sewing projects and repairs, washing and waxing the hull, and shining the stainless fittings with the Captain’s permission, of course.



Checked and braided new lines
 on some of our safety equipment.

But all plumbing, electrical, mechanical tasks fall into Captain Dan’s realm of expertise.  I’m more than happy to help in anyway I can, and try to stay within earshot when he’s up to his elbows or fanny working on a complicated fix in the engine compartment or the deep recesses of a locker.

Occasionally, an inordinate amount of grumbling is heard with an all too familiar French tone (ie, F***ING  USELESS PIECE of S***!!!)  and I ask, “What do you need?”

“A lobotomy,” he would blankly respond.

Twenty years ago, I used to laugh when he said this. Ten years ago, I just sighed and waited for him to tell me how I could really be helpful.  A few years ago, I started encouraging him to hire professionals to handle the tough fixes.


The old rubber hose with it's many curves.

     
Today a part finally arrived for our Volvo engine which we needed to install before heading northward.  The Captain immediately arranged the necessary tools and opened the engine compartment.  It took some doing to wrangle the old broken rubber hose out of its place in the engine, as other engine parts impeded its removal.  A few nuts and bolts were removed (dropped and retrieved- SON of a B****!) and a wire or two were inadvertently disconnected (G D M F*****!!!).

“What’s the matter?  What do you need? !” I cried.

“A lobotomy,” he hissed. 

Yes, that IS a hammer in the Captain's hand...

He was having great difficulty with getting a nut screwed back onto the hose’s clamp that was tucked in between the engine components.  I was able to use my thinner, longer fingers to accomplish the task with ease.

A lobotomy.  Really?  He’s been asking for one for years, maybe My Captain is serious.  Christmas is right around the corner, but do you think Medicare would cover that?